EVERY PASSING MOMENT...

As the mounds of snow outside begin to melt, dirtied by the elements of everyday life, it’s easy to forget just how flawless it was at first – a blanket of beauty, untouched and untainted by man or machine, covering the earth like a cloud fallen from the sky.

Our experience of snow, like so many things in life, is dependent upon where it lands and what we do with it. We can push it to the side of the road, or celebrate its possibility as the perfect path for a day of sledding.

Violence is really no different. We don’t come out of the womb wanting to hurt another human being. Our hearts and minds are a blank slate, ready to absorb the ways of the world. When your world is filled with violence, it’s inevitable that’s the framework you’ll follow moving forward.

Extensive psychological research has shown a direct correlation between a child’s exposure to violence and their likelihood of being violent. A study out of Wake Forest University and published in the Journal of Pediatrics shows children learn violent behaviors largely in their immediate social groups such as their family and friends, but also by observing it in their neighborhoods and community at large. Furthermore, the study found when children are disciplined with severe corporal punishment, verbal abuse, or when they are physically or sexually abused, they are more likely to behave aggressively or violently toward others.

Children who witness intimate partner violence growing up are three times more likely than their peers to engage in violent behavior. These children are also more likely than their peers to be in abusive intimate partner relationships in the future and suffer serious adult health problems like obesity, heart disease, depression, substance abuse, and unintended pregnancies than peers who do not witness domestic violence.

The good news is because violence is learned, it can be unlearned. One of the most important factors that helps children succeed after experiencing domestic violence is a strong relationship with a caring, nonviolent parent or adult. You can promote a child’s recovery by taking steps to increase safety in their surroundings, helping them develop relationships with other supportive adults, and encouraging them in school or other activities that make them feel happy and proud.

In life, every passing moment is another opportunity to change it all. You can be the hope for a child once pushed aside to find the perfect path. Because one thing we know about Wisconsin is it always snows again.

Let’s go sledding.