In the Eyes of a Child
Domestic violence is an experience that causes ripple effects going far beyond the adults involved in an incident. It affects all family members, including children and adolescents growing up in homes impacted by violence and abuse. While not all of the children of Sojourner’s adult clients receive services directly, we do offer services specifically for children and teens suffering violence in their families.
“It impacts their entire life, not only externally but also internally in the way they think and can process information, the way they learn, the way they feel about themselves, the way the feel about the world. It just impacts every part of a kid.“ Maggie P. is a Children’s Advocate and Camp Hope Coordinator at Sojourner. “Sometimes hurt and pain and abuse and unhealthy love is all they know and they think that’s normal. You’re going to do what you’re taught and what you see. I think Children’s Program as a whole does a great job reframing those things for kids in a healthy and progressive way whether it be in support groups or arts programs or Camp Hope, our annual summer camp for kids – really teaching them what healthy relationships look like and teaching them social and emotional regulation skills.”
Sojourner does that through programming tailored to meet the safety and emotional needs of children affected by domestic violence.
One such program is Camp Hope – a weeklong sleep away camp for kids aged 8 to 16 and is supervised by Sojourner. Through the Camp Hope curriculum, children participate in a variety of activities designed to support their emotional needs and create kinship with other kids who have been through similar experiences. They engage in traditional camp activities like field games, swimming, rock climbing, a ropes courses, art projects, and campfire songs. After Camp, participants and their families are invited to attend year-long reunion events, maintaining support and connection throughout the year.
Another program specifically directed toward children is Sojourner’s Child Witness to Domestic Violence. CWDV is a 12-week, group-based support program for children and their protective parents. The program offers education on domestic violence, trauma, and healthy relationships and is designed to promote parent-child coping and improve family relationships amongst participants and caregivers. Lesson themes include encouraging open discussion about violence and breaking the taboo and secrecy, normalizing reactions and feelings, safety planning, positive conflict resolution, safe vs. unsafe touching, and building self-esteem.
“Kids who have been through things, who are displaying their trauma with big emotions and big behaviors that don’t meet the standard norm of the setting they’re in, kind of get ridiculed and labeled as bad kids. I think every kid deserves a cheerleader and a mentor and to really believe that they can grow and succeed and be the best version of themselves, especially kids who’ve been through trauma. They truly need that cheerleader and someone to support them when they’re having those big emotions.,” according to Maggie.
Sojourner’s research shows the single greatest predictor of children’s success in spite of childhood trauma is the presence of a safe, predictable adult caregiver who invests in their well-being. That can be a parent, teacher, coach, or anyone in the child’s life who wants to see them thrive. “Kids are so great to work with because they’re so magical…I’ve always been inspired by kids resilience and the way they bounce back from situations and also how they see the good in situations. It’s just incredible. Kids are amazing.”